Back in Sao Paulo... and soon, back in the US!

I'm in Sao Paulo again, this time with my friend Paul, and I'm soooo happy to be here. Things are finally improving. Man, I didn't realize how much I needed to be with friends. After Marisa and I split up when she went back to England and I went to Salvador, I was in such need to be around people. I met some really amazing people in Salvador and Morro in the hostels, but it just isn't the same as being with friends who really know you. I also had a hard time having to tell the story of my attack over and over again when people asked (my face was still really purple when I got there), and as much as I wanted to be funny and witty about it and make up cool stories, I just hadn't quite gotten to the point mentally where I could see the humor in things... I was mostly just miserable, self-conscious, and lonely. BUT, now my eyes are looking better every day, and I think within a couple days I'll be back to my old self. I'm even starting to find the attacked-by-an-angry-band-of-midgets version of my story hilarious!! I'm with Paul which makes me so happy, and I'm in his comfortable house, where I have my own room and can just relax. Oh, and let's not forget that he makes the BEST jumbo caipirinhas. Even better, my friend Marie, the French reporter I met in Rio, is here in SP, so it is like a big reunion!

Last night the 3 of us tried going out to a place called The Week, which is supposedly the "world's best gay bar." (No, really.) We had some caipirinhas and pizza in the house, got all dolled up, and met up with some of Paul's friends, who drove us out to the spot. Thousands of fashionable looking boys and the occasional girl were pouring in from all directions- the place seemed hip. But the fees, oh the fees! I forgot I'm in Sao Paulo, the world's most expensive city. Forget NYC, Tokyo, and London. It's seriously more expensive here! The fee to get in was R$40 for boys (US $25ish) and for girls it was... dun dun dun dun... R$65 (US $40)!! Finally, a place where the girls pay more! I thought it would never happen. Anyway, the cost comes with nothing but the pleasure of seeing and being seen. No free beer. Probably not even toilet paper. The three of us looked around, decided that mayyyybe if it was that much to go in, we might be even more unpleasantly surprised by the drink prices, and we happily skipped off to more mellow Vila Madalena, a hip part of town that's much more up my alley anyway. So sorry, kids. No pics of the world's best gay bar.

It's a lazy, rainy Sunday in SP, perfect for lounging, trip planning, and job hunting. I know my trip is ending soon, especially since I've made the executive decision to cut out a couple parts and end a couple weeks early. I'm out of money, my backpack is getting heavier, and something about knowing I'll be home soon makes me really eager to just get there! So I'm skipping Bolivia and northern Argentina, both areas I do really, really want to see, but will just have to do on another trip. I've been gone now for 13 months, which is quite a long time, so I feel like I've accomplished my goals and been successful here, and I have no shame in feeling ready to see my family and friends back home again after so much time. South America will still be here when I am ready to travel again-- which hopefully is soon!

So it's official-- I will be back in Buenos Aires by mid-March, and back in Philadelphia by the end of the month! Then I will be in Massachusetts around April 12th. So get ready. :-)

But enough about that. I'm still traveling and have plenty more amazing things to see before I am home. Tomorrow (or Tuesday?) I will head for the beautiful southern Brasilian beach town of Florianopolis for a few days. Then I plan to visit the world famous Iguazu Falls, located on the border of Brasil, Paraguay, and Argentina. Everyone I know who has been there says they are absolutely stunning, and some even say their visit to Iguazu was the best part of their trip! So I'm excited to see those. And then I plan to cross back into Argentina there, and head to Cordoba to visit my Machu Picchu friends (remember, I did the Inca Trail with 12 Argentines!! Seems like ages ago..), then a quick visit to Rosario (birthplace of Che Guevara and overall cool city), and then back to Buenos Aires. And you know, not only will it be great to see my friends back in BsAs, but it will also be fun to just enjoy the city and not have to work! Finally!

...e iré lejos, como un bohemio...

I've made some big, big, BIG life decisions recently, so listen up, peeps!

First of all, my biggest news of all is that I've decided to apply to graduate school at the School for International Training (SIT) in Brattleboro, Vermont for Fall '10. Yes, this means that if I get it (fingers crossed please!) I will be gracing you all with my presence back in the NE. The program would be a 1-year Masters in International Education, the focus being on managing international education/study programs, which many of you know that 1) I've wanted to do for a long time, and 2) well, I'm kind of perfect for. :-) So I'm very excited to have discovered this program, and will be working on getting my application in ASAP!

Also, I'll be leaving Buenos Aires, basically for good, the first week of December. This is something I've gone back and forth about forever... do I stay? do I go? keep trying? will it get better? will I learn to love it? Frankly, the past 7.5 months that I've been here have been bittersweet. I've learned so much, grown and changed so much, and gained incredibly valuable life experience, and I wouldn't change that for anything. However, it's also taken its toll on me. The people aren't what I'd --ahem-- wished they would be. It's not an open, friendly place. I have my friends, most of whom are from other countries like me, and I love them to death. But it's a lonely life here. I never quite fit in, never quite made it totally work. Every day has been a challenge with work life, cultural issues, people, and just general navigation of my daily life. And challenges are good, and its been good for me in many ways, but I think I've gotten what I can out of this experience, and it's time to move on. I just never fell in love with Buenos Aires the way I guess I hoped I would.

So, this is not bad news! It's actually very exciting. After spending this whole year teaching (and really loving it in the end), I feel so confident about this decision, and so ready to take on whatever life throws at me next. I am a strong believer that everything happens for a reason, and that each decision we make, each turn we make when the road divides and we choose our path, is right. It's right, even when it's wrong. Because as the old saying goes, "when one door close, another door always opens." I live my life by this philosophy, and it's taken me this far.

My next adventure is (well, after I turn in my grad school application, of course) to do a long trip around South America. It's such a huge, diverse continent, with so many amazing things to see an do, and I want to soak up as much as possible before I go. Because who knows when the next time I will be passing through S. America will be! I've decided to travel for approximately 4 months, December-March, then popping back into BsAs for my good byes (and to get my stuff) and then heading back to the States around mid-April.

The very-tentative-and-very-subject-to-change plan is to visit both the northern and southern regions of Argentina, Peru, Colombia, Brasil, and Bolivia. My friend Dave will be down for a visit in November, and we'll go to Patagonia together, thus checking that off the list! So the rest will happen Dec-March, and will probably go in the order I listed them. I want a full month in Colombia and another full month in Brasil, I want to climb Machu Picchu, I want to explore Bolivia, I want to spend Carnaval in Rio! I want to do a lot. And you know what, I'm young (for a little while longer!) so why not?

Travel is worth going totally broke for.

So that, my friends, is my grand update. I welcome any and all suggestions you have about my travels, and any feedback you have on these new plans and ideas! I'm very excited, nervous too, but mostly just happy to throw my backpack on and do some serious traveling, and then see my friends and family back in the States again. By the time I get back in April, 14 months will have passed. I think that's plenty.

Love to all!

The People's Republic of Florida

Quick rant-- I'm not so sure having been to Florida exactly counts as a visit to the United States. I mean, sure, somewhere in the fine print I suppose Florida is technically part of the US, but... come on! We all know that Florida is a separate country... at least culturally speaking.

So, for those of you saying that you've experienced American culture (and especially to those of you who seem to have strong opinions of "who my people are" based on that experience) because you spent a week or two lounging on the beaches of Miami (speaking Spanish, no less) and then another week parading from one attraction to another at Disney World, well you, my friend, are mistaken.

That is all! :-)

MUSIC

I love music, you love music. If you don't love music, what do you live for?

I think a lot about the soundtrack to my life. I feel like everything I'm doing, there is a song playing in the background, literally or figuratively, that sort of narrates it all... it's like a free concert in there at all times, and I have the VIP pass... which explains why I have been known, from time to time, to bust out in a sudden dance party in the middle of the street. I don't need outside music to dance-- it's inside my head. I wonder a lot, what would the sound track be if they were to make a movie about my life?.. and then I make long, long, endless lists inside my head...

(It's a very schizophrenic soundtrack, and I'm not so sure anyone would actually buy it, but it starts off sort of slow and jammy with a Dispatch/Ani DiFranco collaboration, and Tracy Chapman is there [like a dream] and I think India.Arie is in there somewhere too... then it goes all nuts and Jurassic 5, Eminem, Snoop Dogg, and Outkast all step in to take care of things... which logically progresses to Weezer, fading into Ween, then Iron and Wine... in the distance, the Buena Vista Social Club is playing... in the foreground, it's a messy dance off between Michael Jackson and Madonna... the Beatles start to fade in and next thing you know, Amy Winehouse is there. naturally, MGMT comes next, followed by a confusing mish mash of The Clash, Johnny Cash, the Killers, Nirvana, Pink Floyd, Portishead... Britney Spears?? where did she come from?! and then it's just Lauryn Hill, a capella, joined eventually by a solo Joe Strummer [without his Mescaleros], and then a single guitar... drums... BASS... salsa beats, tango... acoustic... electric... rock n roll, swing... reggae reggae reggae [this is, of course, my life, afterall]... the Chili Peppers are never far away, Sublime wants in on the fun, and all the while, Yo La Tengo has been playing 'Autumn Sweater' over and over... then 2Pac! then Cake!... then a moment of silence... and then it goes on and on and on...)

Is the soundtrack to my life bilingual? trilingual? more?

Well, now that my life is in Spanish, I'm becoming more and more into música en español. I've always been into a few bands here and there, but lately I find myself listening to more in Spanish than in English. It's good practice, but also, I've just been discovering a lot of bands I like. Thought I'd share them with you... no pressure, but if you want to practice your Spanish, maybe you could brush up with some of these band recommendations.

Disclaimer: This is a non-comprehensive list and a very spur-of-the-moment blog post. Feel free to add/ suggest stuff, congratulate me for my great choices, or berate me for my terrible taste.

Some favorites/ classics from various countries:
Manu Chao-- If for some reason you've been under a rock for the last 10 years and haven't heard his stuff, GO GET IT NOW. He's originally from France, but sings in Spanish, English, and French.
Orishas-- Cuban hip hop, not to be missed.
Maná-- One of the greatest bands OF ALL TIME. From Mexico. I particularly recommend their unplugged album.
Buena Vista Social Club-- A bunch of old Cuban men making music??? Yes, please! Pretty much amazing.
Jarabe de Palo-- I am in LOVE. Sometimes I spend hours listening to the same 5 Jarabe de Palo songs on repeat. From Spain.

Some Argentine rock you should know about that I've been rocking out to lately:
Los Fabulosos Cadillacs
Bersuit Vergarabat
Soda Stereo
No Te Va a Gustar
Los Piojos
Divididos
Charly García
Babasónicos
(...ugh I am looking for more good local bands, so Argentine readers, please burn me some CDs so I can recommend, yes?? Gracias.)

Anyway, enjoy.

What will become of me???

The eternal question-- where will I end up?? Those who know me best can attest that this is a very tough question for me. I just really, really, really don't know. And although the "not knowing" is what can make life exciting, it's also what makes it a bit scary.

I've been thinking a lot lately about what to do next year. I don't need to decide yet, but it's nice to get the ball rolling in the decision-making section of my brain.

I've also been thinking a lot lately about travel, and how I've got the bug big time. I'm 28 years old, and I'm not getting any younger. I feel like now is the time. I have a lifetime goal of visiting every Spanish-speaking country in the world. I am in South America! I want to write more... I want inspiration. I want to explore. I want to climb Machu Picchu, and relax on the beaches of Colombia. I want to learn first hand how to say "what's up" in every Spanish-speaking country's local slang. (For example: Cubans say "Qué bolá?" which is unique to them. I find this sort of thing fascinating.) I want to travel like I mean it.

It's true that I tend to change my life plan almost every day, but I have yet another tentative one I thought I'd just throw out there for you to comment on. I'm thinking:

1. Work my various teaching jobs in Buenos Aires through November, which is more or less when the regular school year ends.
2. Spend the month of December traveling around Argentina-- it's a huge country! I want to explore Patagonia for a few weeks, and also head north to Salta. For Christmas, maybe I'll head back to BsAs, or lounge on the beach in Mar de Plata.
3. Spend January and February living in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. A couple of my lady friends down here and I are talking about renting a place there, and well, I'd be crazy to pass up the chance. I was thinking I could spend the summer there for those 2 months, and enroll in some Portuguese classes. It's high time I learned a 3rd language. Plus, it's like a dream to be in Rio for Carnival!!! Yesssss.
4. Head to Peru and climb Machu Picchu in early March. Take my time. Contemplate a culture that allows its people to pee and poo in the streets. Eat some quinoa, and take some amazing photos.
5. Head home for a visit in the United States from late March-April... yay! I'll hit up Boston, Westport, and Philly, so no one feels left out. Plus, I'll be there for Christie's, my mom's, Natalia's, and my birthdays, and I may even be able to make it to Amanda and Joe's wedding!!!! (see?? I didn't forget you guys.)
6. Move to... WHERE??? At the end of April... to continue teaching.

This is the big question mark, people! WHERE?! Hence the big poll I've set up at the top of the blog. PLEASE VOTE. I am really, genuinely interested in your opinion. Let me explain the choices:

1. New York City-- I'm just not feeling ready to fall back into the rhythm of Boston or Philadelphia. I'm sorry! But I could use a new adventure, and I figure NYC is between my two "home" cities, between the 2 sides of my family (my mom is in MA and my dad is in Philly), and could be a happy medium for heading back Stateside. However, I am not totally sold on this idea. Oh man, the thought of moving to NYC actually scares the living &*$# out of me, but in theory I'm willing to consider it.

2. Brazil-- I'd looooove to live in Brazil! I hear it's amazing, and the people are just so damn likable. The only problem is the visa situation-- I'm not sure I can get one. :-/

3. Italy-- I think a lot about moving to Europe! And although Spain is tempting, I think I might like to try something new. To everyone's surprise, I am actually half Italian (thanks, Dad!) and speak a minimal amount of Italian. It would be an incredible experience to live in Italy for a while, improve my Italian and experience such an incredible culture. Not to mention, eat eat EAT!

4. Mexico-- Most of you know that I left my heart in Mexico years ago. I'm not finished with Mexico, and my soul knows it. Sometimes I dream about living there again. Sometimes it seems like the most obvious choice. Mexico is one of my favorite places in the world. Perhaps it is my destiny. I can't explain the draw, but I must go back soon. Perhaps not now, but soon. My love affair with the Pacific Coast of Mexico has not yet ended...

5. Stay in Argentina-- I've had my ups and downs, that's for sure. But I've also spent some serious time and energy creating a life for myself here, and I get sad when I think about leaving all of this. My life here isn't perfect, but it gets a little better every day. I've made some very special friends here, and I have some of the best roommates a girl could ask for. I like teaching, and I've finally learned to support myself. I feel myself changing a little bit more every day. Living here is not easy. In fact, it's the hardest thing I've ever done. Yet I've grown so much, and gotten so much stronger. I know myself now better than ever. I could see myself here for another year.

Please help! If you are taking the time to read my blog, I probably love you and will really value your opinion. If you vote, it's anonymous, but feel free to leave a comment to say what you voted for and why!

RIP Vivian

I just received some absolutely devastating news, and I have no idea what to do.

As many of you know, I lived in Havana, Cuba for 4.5 months back in the spring of 2004. I lived with 2 different host families. The second was a woman named Vivian, a divorcee with 2 kids, one living in Florida and another named Diosdado who was my age and lived down the street from us. She was an AMAZING host mother, and we were very close while I lived there. She thought of me as a daughter, and I thought of her very much as my mother while I was there. She always took care of me, cooked for me every day, worried about me like a mom, and just generally was a strong source of support in my life during my time in Cuba.

The past couple of years I have completely lost touch with her. She didn't have email, and so our only connection was through her friend's email account, so I'd send emails to her friend, who would then pass them on to her. I've been worrying for years, because for a long time I have not received a response. Still, every few months or so I send a message, just to tell her I am thinking of her and hoping to hear from her soon.

I sent one of these messages about a month ago, but this time slightly more frantic than usual. I had been thinking of her nonstop, and just felt so upset that I hadn't heard from her in so long. I sent a message to the friend, Ada, asking her to pleeease PLEASE send me any information she had about Vivian, since so much time had gone by, and I was worrying about losing the connection forever.

I just walked in the door from a lovely weekend with my mom and Bill, and checked my email, and there was one from Ada saying that Vivian died 3 years ago. She was struck suddenly with brain cancer. By the time she found out, she had less than 6 months to live. Ada doesn't know anything about the whereabouts of any of Vivian's kids.

But she's gone, and I totally missed it. Three years have gone by, and here I have been, living my life, totally unaware. I feel absolutely devastated. I want to cry, but I am just in so much shock I can barely move. I miss her terribly. I hope she knew how much she meant to me.

REST IN PEACE, VIVIAN.

Vivian and me in our house:



RIP VIVIAN

Transience, abandonment, and the flakiest people in the world

Most people can't relate to me. My friends and supporters seem to find me interesting, intriguing, filled with stories, ballsy and independent, experienced as hell, well-traveled, free-thinking and adventurous (not to mention slightly insane), but can they actually relate to me? In many ways, yes, but in my transience, almost never.

It's a lonely life, being the one who's always saying good bye. Your skin just kind of thickens after a while, I guess. I keep pushing on. I can't really explain it, but there is something inside of me that keeps me moving, and it hasn't yet found its final resting place. I am (and people like me are) happier traveling, experiencing new people, places and things, and constantly living life in a challenging and slightly uncomfortable way, than I am living a comfortable life in the same place with the same people, doing stuff that makes me, well, "normal."

I sound like such an alterna-hipster, but I assure you, my soul is speaking quite directly right now, regardless of the current trendiness of transience. And the consequence of all of this, the dirty truth of the wandering soul, is that I live my life saying good bye to people I love. I grow attached, and then people disappear, or I do. I hate good-byes.

I'm really, really struggling with this right now. More than ever, my two selves are in conflict. One self wants to travel, see the world, keep moving, and continue to seek new adventures in new places for as long as the wind keeps blowing. It wants to be free, totally independent and guided by instinct. It doesn't want an office job, nor does it crave normality. My other self wants to create a lasting community, live my days with the ones I love most, grow old with those people, find lasting love, and umm.... be financially stable!!! Yes, this other self is quite sick of stressing about money.

They are in total conflict. For example, I simply cannot live in a different country every year while simultaneously creating a lasting community.

So last week, my close friend Megan left, and I was devastated. It was a little reminder that the friends one meets while traveling are a whole separate category. There's no promises made, no longevity expected. We'll always be friends, of course, but I most likely won't be seeing her for the next couple of years.

Then last night, at an amazing concert by a group called Onda Vaga (Highly recommended! Listen to them here.), my close, close, close friend Paul announced that he is leaving in 2 weeks to live in Brazil with his dad. Abandoning me!!! Then I lamented this fact later on with my friend Kieran, and that is when Kieran told me that he would also be leaving Buenos Aires in less than a month.

Anyone else want to kick me while I'm down???

This kind of thing is exactly what I should expect, but yet I can't get used to it! It is starting to feel like everyone I meet is going to leave me, and is making me feel like I need to conduct some sort of extensive interview with people when I meet them, to find out how long they plan to stay, then judge accordingly how worthwhile it is to get to know them. For example,

"Hi, Person X. How long do you plan on sticking around Buenos Aires?"

a) 1-3 months --> Sorry, let's not be friends. You'll only break my heart.
b) 3-6 months --> Cool, let's hang out, but I will try not to get too attached.
c) 6-12 months --> Alright awesome, let's be friends! I will deal with emotions later.
d) 1 year or more --> Let's be BFF!!! We can say good bye to everyone else together.

A big part of the problem, of course, is that all of my friends are also from other countries, who are traveling or living here for reasons similar to mine. So of course, there is an inherit level of transience that just comes with the territory. The solution, then, is to make local friends right??

Right???

This brings me to my next topic of discussion/ lamentation. "The flakiest people in the world." AKA Argentinians!!!!

Hey, Argentina-- you're flaky!!! And I'm SO NOT INTO IT!!!

Argentinians seem to operate on a "yes to all questions" principle, which basically means that nothing an Argentinian says ever means anything. Seriously. Ask anyone who's spent any significant time here, and I can almost guarantee they'll agree.

For example, you're at a bar, and you meet a group of Argentinians. You start to hang out, and the next thing you know, an hour as gone by, and you've been chatting it up and hitting it off. You're thinking, cool, new friends! They give you a hug good bye, maybe you even exchange numbers, and then they say, "let's go out sometime!" or "see you later!"

Uh oh. That's bad. "Let's go out sometime" = "See you never."

Seriously, unless you make a specific plan right there on the spot, you will most likely never see the person again. They just like being friendly, and for them saying something like, "let's go out sometime" is equal to saying "good bye." It's just something you say as you walk out a door, but it doesn't actually mean anything.

Another example: You invite an Argentinians out to a party. They respond and say yes, they'll be there. They never show up. TYPICAL! Why? Because there's no such thing as the word "no" in Argentina. So if they can come they say "yes," and if they can't come they say "yes." Seriously. So yes means both yes and no, which means it basically means nothing at all.

The reason that most people seem to cite for this is that people here have generally had the same group of friends their entire life, literally since they were kids, and it's near impossible to find people who are willing to go through the trouble of opening up their posse to a new person. The task of initiation is just too much, I suppose.

Anyway, this makes making friends super difficult, because I keep meeting these awesome people (ahem, "awesome" being a purely subjective term in this case) and thinking we'll hang out, and I never hear from them again. There was a group of girls a while back, for example, who I met through a friend. They were all gung-ho about hanging out and insisted on exchanging email addresses, and then I sent them all an invite to go out last weekend, and not one single one responded! When I mentioned this to my friend who'd introduced us, she was like, "ummmm, Erica, are you surprised?! Don't be! That's just Argentina."

"That's Just Argentina." The slogan of my life. Where no rules apply.

Yes means no.

Happy Labor Day!

Today, May 1st, is a holiday widely recognized in many countries (including Argentina) as the Day of the Workers, aka Labor Day. I celebrated by working a couple hours this morning (blasphemy, I know, but I need the money), getting sick, and canceling my plans in favor of staying home watching a movie with my roommate and getting to bed early. Yep, that's where I'm headed after this blog post. I turned down a house party, a dinner invitation, and an opportunity to go salsa dancing (my favorite!!) all to stay home and allow myself to relax. It's something I don't do nearly enough. I get sucked into "social butterfly" mode too easily and don't always take care of myself. Today is a new day.

After all, I need to get up very early tomorrow! First thing in the morning (aka I have to get up at 6:30am), my friend Megan and I are heading to Colonia, Uruguay for the day for a little getaway and to get our visas renewed. Yep, I am living here on a tourist visa, which means that every time it expires (every 90 days) I need to leave the country and then re-enter, in order to get a new visa. Total pain, but it's an excuse to go do something different. I don't really have the money for the trip, but hey, I have to do it so I'm going to enjoy it! I think we will just wander around the town, do some exploring, have a very long lunch, and head back. If something super amazing happens, you, my dear blog readers, will be the first to know.

Lastly, I just took this picture while sitting here. It's probably not that interesting to you, but for me it is symbolic, so I'm posting anyway. It's the table next to my desk, in front of my bed. I spend a lot of time staring at it.



That piece of paper in the front on the left is my notice from the Correo Argentino that I received a package. I think it's from Dave. (Hi, Dave!) Unfortunately I still have not picked it up. I have to go all the way across town where I will need to wait in line for a couple hours and then BUY the package. I know, the system is so messed up. But I plan to do it next Wednesday, which is my next day off! I will get that package!! But anyway, this does remind me-- please don't send me a package unless it's like, super important. I learned this the hard way after spending $75 receiving my last 2 (amazing and greatly appreciated!) care packages (one from Ben and one from the Girl Posse! <3 <3). We can stick to cards. ;-)

The flower is a carnation that some random guy gave me on the street. I was walking through Puerto Madero and he tried to hand it to me, and of course my instinct was to assume he was trying to sell them to me and to say "no, gracias" and keep walking. And he was like, "no, it's free! it's a gift!" and just gave it to me. A lovely little random act of kindness. So it's current home is in my bottle of San Telmo Malbec. Yep, my awesome neighborhood even has a wine named after it. ;-)

Stacks of books.. most of which are unread because I spend all my "free" time planning lessons... the "Quilmes" cup I just had to buy for myself as a cheesy souvenir, which is a Quilmes beer can that an artist turned into a mug with a handle. My old broken cell phone that I really need to get rid of...

And of course, my mate. That's that gourd-looking thing with the metal straw thing poking out of it (known as the "bombilla"). The mate (pronounced "mah-tay") is what Argentines use to drink yerba mate, which is a strong, bitter tasting traditional tea. You fill the mate with the yerba, then fill it with hot water and drink it through the bombilla. You just keep refilling it with hot water and passing it around until it gets too weak to enjoy. Some people don't like it, but I absolutely love it. It's a wonderfully social, too-- you see people all over the city drinking mate with friends in parks and on benches. And it's also known to be incredibly good for you, stimulating the metabolism and enhancing mental clarity.

Last but not least is one of my favorite pictures ever of Kirsten, Ben, and Me! Ben mailed it to me (in aforementioned care package!), and I am so happy to have it. Reminds me of my amazing Boston friends every day. I'm having a great time down here and I'm so glad I came, BUT I miss yooooooo!!!!!!!

Getting used to it

I'm going to refer to Vivian from now on by name, since she is rapidly becoming an important figure in many of my stories.

Vivian is my CRAZYPANTS boss, the one who sends me from here to there and all around, yells at me, acts all nuts-o, and who I have never actually met in person. (She's sort of like "Dr. Claw" from Inspector Gadget, because I picture her in a big chair, stroking her evil cat, and drumming her iron-gloved fingers on the desk, faceless.) That's Vivian.

Dr. Claw and MAD Cat (aka Vivian's iron fist of English-teaching death)


So the strangest thing has happened. I don't give a %$#& what she thinks anymore! It's very liberating.

Basically, over the past couple weeks Vivian drove me so completely nuts, was so totally gonzo, was so blatantly disrespectful to me, that I completely lost it. I broke down, cried about it, and got very worked up about it. Then about a week passed, and despite my threats to quit, as it turns out I'm broke, need the money, and am still working for her minimally. (The good news is that I did eventually get my money from her-- wasn't easy, mind you--and she and I are back to acting cordial on the phone.) I figure, whatever, the pay's not bad, and frankly, I now realize that she is the rule, not the exception. All English pimps (Vivian) treat their whores (Me) this way here. I'm moving on.

Truth is, Argentina is just like this! It's disorganized, chaotic, and mind-numbingly slow at all things. Employers are self-serving, and treat you as their pawn. Your needs are not important, only theirs. And as much as I hate this, I am also becoming hardened. Yes, I'm getting used to it, and the only way to survive is to stop caring so much.

Case in point: Vivian was supposed to call me yesterday at Noon to arrange a meeting (finally!) so she could give me some books I need for a class. However, the last time she told me she'd call me at noon, she didn't call until almost 5:00pm, only to cancel on me, yell at me, and then stiff me out of money. So my expectations were pretty low yesterday. So low, in fact, that I myself forgot about the whole thing! Me! And it worked out great, because when she finally called me around 1:00 (to cancel, of course), I didn't care! I hadn't been waiting by the phone, nor had I rearranged my day around her.

I had become, ahem, more Argentine.

This all probably sounds really nuts, but it's actually really good. It's a coping mechanism, and it's working. I think my blood pressure has gone back down to normal in the past couple days, and damnit, I'm going to last here a full year if it kills me! (which it might)

This means I need to stop having such "American" expectations of professionalism. I need to suck it up, lower the bar, and integrate. Working on it.

A love/ hate relationship

Last week was undoubtedly one of the worst weeks I've ever had. It was up there anyway. Just about everything that could go wrong went wrong. My boss yelled at me, then made me trek across town for my paycheck, only to stiff me out of some money. My cell phone died, and when I went to buy more minutes, I was sold a fake card and got ripped off yet again. Then turned out the parts they sold me for the phone were broken too, and to fix the phone I needed to go to the store, but since it was Semana Santa the store was closed. General stress and all the "little things" started to pile up, and financial worries and work worries started to settle in. By Wednesday night, I had ended up in some sort of mental break down. No fun. My poor (wonderful) roommates bore the brunt of it. Much wine was consumed by all.

Then yesterday, I had one of those days that made me remember why I'm here. Just one of those great, lovely days. Sure, a lot of my problems still exist (work! broken phone! no money! ugh!) and I need to deal with that, but not yesterday. Easter Sunday was a great day, despite its total lack of anything remotely related to Easter.

My roommate Andrea has a friend in town, Yasmine, and the three of us started off our day by sitting at the café across the street drinking coffee on the street. Coffee and company were good, and things were looking up. Sundays in San Telmo are the best (as long as you can handle it), as it is the day of the feria when all the antiques dealers, artisans/ artists, and street musicians come out to play. We spent the afternoon walking up Defensa (the main drag, just a couple blocks from my house) and checking out all the interesting art and music, just having good clean fun.

Some of the highlights of the antiques market:



One of my favorite bands that plays on Sundays, a tango group featuring lots of hot accordion players: ;-)



In girly news, I also finally broke down and bought myself the bag I've been obsessing over for a week, as a little shopping therapy for myself. Oooh it's so cute! And as if that wasn't great enough, then my friend Charlotte met up with us, and we all went to enjoy a big fat choripan (chorizo sandwich with chimichurri and provenzal). YUM! [nom nom nom]

We spent a long time watching an amazing street artist paint live portraits of famous musicians (here with Amy Winehouse) to music, all with his hands and some splattering techniques. He's so entertaining to watch! I always see this guy around, and love his work.



As the day grew later, we ended up with some litros of cerveza on the sidewalk, planted in front of an amazing cumbia band playing their hearts out. We watched the dancers, wiggled a bit ourselves, enjoyed the cervezas and each other's company, and just appreciated the music, and being in a place where moments like that exist. Really, as I sat there am looked out into the crowd of happy people dancing, talking, and enjoying the music, I looked at the gorgeous cobble stoned street and the lovely colonial buildings around me surrounded by balconies covered in flowers, and I thought to myself, "this is why I came here." The stress of the week melted away right then, even if just for a moment.

On the way home, we walked by a man selling gorgeous Bugambilia flowers (called Santa Rita in Spanish) out of the back of his bicycle, and I had to have one. I ran after him, and Andrea and I both bought a couple for our balconies.



They make all the difference! Our balconies are now vibrant with lovely white, purple, and pink flowers. Plus, they look great alongside my other happy little plants, Flor and Máximo Junior.





Then to top off the whole evening, my other roommate Julie, who is French, and a friend of her's also from France, made us delicious crepes! We had some with ham and cheese, others with tuna, and then tons with nutella, dulce de leche, jams, and even one I insisted on making with peanut butter and chocolate. Oh man, what a dinner!

And now, I'm ready to begin a new week. I start a new job tomorrow, one I trained for last week, but officially begin tomorrow. I have a lot of work ahead of me and a lot of business to take care of. But... one step at a time.